I haven't participated in it in a while, but today's Show Us Your Life on Kelly's Korner seemed fun. Today's topic is marriage advice. Now, mind you, I've only been married 21 months and 6 days, so I don't know everything. But I do know a few things.
- Laugh a lot. We laugh all the time. Dan is a funny, funny guy. Sometimes he just gets in these moods and his only goal seems to be cracking me up. Those are fabulous moments. And keep in mind they don't have to be funny to anyone else. Some people just would not get our humor, and that's okay, because we do.
- Never go to bed angry. People debate on this one. Some folks think that if you're mad, you should just go to bed and rehash it when you're rested and the emotions aren't so fresh. We, however, are strong believers in not going to bed angry. That doesn't mean we solve everything before bed and that we don't have more to discuss the next day, it just means we get ourselves to a point where we can calm down and discuss things enough that we still want to cuddle up to each other.
- Be each other's best friend. I know, another cliche. But this one is so true. I've heard people say it annoys them when wives claim their husband as their best friend. I have some wonderful girl friends, but to me, Dan is everything a best friend is supposed to be. He listens, solves problems, is my rock, and my shoulder. He knows my secrets, fears, hopes, and dreams. He can tell me when I'm wrong and I can respect that. I trust him above all else, and know he always has my best interest at heart. He's the first one I call/text (we're more texters than callers) when something happens. He's my favorite person to do just about anything with. And I'm all of those things for him. I know that's what a spouse is supposed to be, but to me it's also what a best friend is.
- The last bit of advice is from a person I love very dearly, my late uncle. He passed away three days before my sister's wedding, and I shared this piece of advice in my maid-of-honor speech. He told me that marriage is a journey, and it's a long one. It isn't meant to be perfect. There will be good times and bad times. There will be times when love falters, and that doesn't mean you give up. At times, you may fall out of love, but so long as you never fall out of love at the same time, you'll find each other again. I know, it sounds kind of Debbie Downer for marriage advice, but I think it's a good thing to keep in mind over the life of our marriage. We can't expect that every moment of every day of our life together will be bliss. We've been fortunate that so far things have been wonderful, but knowing that sometimes there will be low points when one of us struggles makes me feel a little more assured that everything will end up okay so long as we never both give up on each other.